When I was pregnant, I was adamant that I wanted to know the sex of my baby. By now, you would know I'm a planner at heart, so of course I wanted to know!! It was only when I was discussing it with my colleagues and family members I realized that this view was not the norm. I had so many persons telling me that I will jinx it if I found out (Huh? What is there to jinx?) and I was constantly asked the lovely question "Wouldn't it be better if it was a surprise?" (Excuse? Better for whom?). Even my father-in-law tried to get us to not find out - something about delayed gratification and what not *side eye*
I never understood the big deal about finding out the sex of the baby when they are born and now that I've experienced pregnancy and labour, I can confidently state that I most definitely prefer to find out the sex of my baby beforehand. Here's why:
1. Preparation is Key!
Knowing the sex of my baby helped me prepare down to the fine details. I needed to know what clothes to buy, how to organize the bedroom, paint colours, the works! It nice knowing whether I needed to buy headbands or caps, appropriate blankets, crib sheets and booties/shoes. Although most of baby girl's clothes are gender-neutral in colour - purple, white and grey (I really dislike pink), colour was still an important factor in terms of what I wanted to get for her.
2. Choosing the baby's name
The baby's name is something that is super important to hubby and I. Your name is a part of your identity, your individuality. It gives you a sense of who you are... and that's why it annoys you alot when people mispronounce it or spell it incorrectly (I've had my fair share of that and still get it to this day). As a result of this, Leroy and I didn't want to be calling the baby "it" and/or "baby" or any other thing that popped into our heads - that's super impersonal and for me, doing that made me feel disconnected from this being growing inside of me. We wanted to be able to call her by her name and pronoun while she was still in my tummy so she can know it from the time she was born. Plus, I didn't want Leroy and I to be scrambling to figure out a name after she was born or have a prolonged period where she had no name at all. We wanted her name to be completely thought out, agreed upon and chosen under the right circumstances.
3. Personalize all the baby stuff!
Come on! I didn't need to say this! I love getting stuff personalized! The first thing I did when we agreed on baby girl's name was get a decal of it for the wall of her bedroom. I even got it in the colours that would complement the paint colour of the rest of the room (Amazon was my best friend while pregnant ok?). I had that decal for a minimum of a month because I wanted to have it put up when her room was prepared and ready for the day she was born.
Knowing the sex of the baby made it easier for me to speak to her, pray for her and think about her specifically as a girl. I felt a deeper sense of connection to her; I felt like I knew her already despite not meeting her until she was born. It's an inexplicable feeling but I think any mother who has found out the sex of their baby beforehand can agree with me on this.
There are so many things that can happen during the labour and birth of your baby. However, when the baby is born, the nurse/midwife/doctor/whoever is delivering will hold the baby and their genitalia in front of your face so you can see the sex of the baby. Wouldn't it be great to know what to expect when the baby comes? I remember when baby girl was born, the nurse asked me (before I even saw her) "Did you know what you were having?" to which I replied "Yes". Then she held my blood and mucus covered child in front of my face saying "I need you to tell me what you're seeing. You have a baby..." and I screamed "GIRL!!!!!" That moment was like a confirmation that she was here and I knew for a fact that she was all mine.
Are you pro-knowing the sex or would you prefer being surprised during the delivery?
Let me know in the comments!